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automated translation + SEO –> poetry

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The corners of the internet are lovely, dark and deep…Every now and then you come across content from China or Taiwan that has been run through automated English translation and search engine optimization, resulting in unbelievable thousand-monkeys-on-a-typewriter poetry, which may or may not be dangerous to your computer, just saying. My favorite, which now unfortunately only tells you the seven shocking foods that will help kill abdominal fat, used to be a meditative series of what seemed to be blog posts linking “problem states,” funerals, and coffins, such as a post titled “Dream of people carried the coffin-the problem state” which read:

Push on the river cars, dan dan, selling onions, garlic sale, riding an exam, will pull the donkey drive, stir Rangrang, scrambling across the river into the city. 

Luckily this loss can now be made up by showyourlife.net, which promises to help (presumably) non-English writers create pages like this:

Hi there! I’m a bike messenger by day, aspiring actor by night, and this is my blog. I live in Los Angeles, have a great dog named Jack, and I like piña coladas. (And gettin’ caught in the rain.)

But actually ends up creating much, much better stuff, like this post, Adidas js wings can follow the grave matter acxus, which is a story about how one time in Gaoyi County East Village East Farm, “opened a 50 meters long, a few centimeters wide cracks, the villagers had to go to watch, do not know what causes of.” It manages to touch upon the Anti-Japanese war, drought, and mysterious natural phenomenon…and to randomly insert ad links that you probably should not click on, but which make for lovely reading.

Liu of 69 years old has never seen such crack in the village, “every day I have to have a look Adidas JS Wings, is it right? See cracks become more.

In their cognitive context, Jia Zengmin almost to the exclusion of the every kind of reason.

“It is not the drought dehiscence, below the soil is wet.The fire?So many years nothing ah.

Jia Zengmin spoke Cheap adidas js wings shoes, side of the village said: “the original read reports, said crack is because cemetery in water Jeremy scott Online, can follow the grave matter?Just crack north head is the cemetery.

Do go to the post for the whole story (and spend some time with other posts, like adidas obyo jeremy scott I do not know who is tie, which is about a UFO that got stuck to a “blue hatchback Sega car chassis” in the “East Lake New Technology Development Zone Kansai”).

I can only imagine what kinds of automated Chinese translations are showing up on the flip side!


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